Lessons from the Lift: Finding Peace, Perspective and Perseverance when you are stuck

I got stuck in a lift a few days ago. It was a one hour ordeal. It was not the best day of the week already, and as I entered the lift and realised it didn’t close properly nor could open, I had to face the reality – the reality of getting stuck in a lift for some time till help comes.

The thing about this incident is that it reminded me of some issues in my life I had been stuck in for ages, that I would rather not have been reminded of. But a mini miracle happened that day, and rather than going down the usual spiral of negative thought patterns – this time – I managed to find some gems and life lessons through this harmless ordeal.

Its not Your fault sometimes

There are times where you ought to take responsibility for being stuck in an issue or less than ideal circumstance in life, like when you gamble your money again and again and end up bankrupt, or when you say something that is really hurtful and find yourself void of a relationship. But there are times when an illness props up and you tried your best, or a loved one dies, and you so blame yourself – but its not your fault. While there is grace for when we have messed up, realising that something really isn’t your fault would directly prevent you from going into loops self doubt – questioning yourself and wondering where you could have done better. A habit which can spiral one down into depression.

When I went into the lift, the first thought that wanted to creep in was – I should have left the student’s house earlier! The thing was, I lingered to talk with her and here was I stuck at the wrong place at the wrong time. Well, that was false guilt and I soon realised that. The lift incident also helped me reflect on the other areas on my life where I blamed myself for an incident that was not within my control. Strangely, I found freedom from both.

People don’t fully understand, but they do care

It was funny because the security guard kept asking me to pull open the door from the inside with him also yanking it from the outside. It may have worked in other cases but in my case, the door was slightly opened and definitely misaligned and as much as I tried it didn’t work.

When I finally managed to get through to him that the inside doors were not what he think was – he finally understood me and stopped telling me to try to yank open the door. He advised me instead just to sit down and wait for the technician.

As I sat there reading, trying focus my mind on something else, I related that so often people on the outside try to help people who are stuck in different areas on the inside. Sometimes the tools work, and sometimes it doesn’t and oh, how important it is to listen.

I also passive aggressively told myself that if I were to help someone, I would want to give skilled help – like that of a technician, not some yanking open the door rubbish.

Well, as I recounted this incident to a good friend, with the help of some kind nudging by my friend, it came to my awareness that while the security guard couldn’t help much, his presence there definitely help. In fact, there were moments in the one hour wait that he told me he was outside and asked me not to fear or panic. It definitely brought reassurance to me.

Well, sometimes I do get angry and upset at the lack of help I truly get from well meaning friends and family, and their lack of understanding of the true situation. However, in such cases, I should realise and acknowledge that their presence and care do make a difference, and that they are waiting it out with me.

I also realised that often, although its hard for a person to be stuck in a situation, it also pains a friend or family as much seeing them stuck and not being able to help. I often selfishly only think about how I feel, forgetting that those closest to me also suffer when they see me suffer. Seeing the situation from this side of the coin helped me realised that I was actually very loved.

Help will come

The beautiful thing is help will come! And help did come that day, albeit a little late as the technician was stuck in traffic. But a little unlocking here and there and I was out in 5 minutes of him sorting the door out. What a relief!

Sometimes, there are situations where we can control the time and nature of the outcome. But there are also times, where we just have to wait and trust that God will send help, that He will not abandon us nor forsake us, however long the waiting may seem.

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Today, if you are stuck in a situation that is painful, may God grant you His peace in the midst of it. May He come speedily to help and may you find the perspective and perseverance in the midst of it all.

Dear Lord, I sometimes get stuck in various areas of my life. During such times, give me the grace to be kind to myself, allowing you to wash away my regrets of the past. Help me to find the right tools and please send the right people to help me. However, help me also to forgive and release those who unknowingly hurt me in the process of helping me get unstuck, realising that many do it out of good intentions. Most of all, help me to look to You and You alone as the Deliverer and answer to my problems.

In Jesus Name, Amen.